I feel I've hardly slept. This week had a bit of a crisi in confidence - read and read over my Chapter Three, which I'll be workshopping tomorrow at City and thought it was crap; then read it again and thought it was really not bad at all - writers bipolar disorder again! Watched Atonement on DVD - thought what a brillaint novel that is - again - and film too; felt slightly inadequate. H assured me my novel is trying to be something entirely different to that - i supose he is right in that its contemporary and urban - but when your exposed to someone like mcKewan you tend to think - how the hell can I rise to that bench mark - its so good, so accomplished,
BG
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I think everyone, even McEwan, has crises of confidence every so often. You'd never be able to improve if you couldn't be your own biggest critic.
ReplyDeleteIt's particularly disturbing when you're reading it out in the class and start thinking 'oh no, this is crap' as went through my mind in parts when I read mine out yesterday.